I Now Pronounce You Man and LIFE



I love that through this blog you guys are getting a deeper glimpse of my favorite person on the planet.  His inner thoughts.  His processes.  His passions.  And when he asked me to give you a peek into my heart, I was happy to share.  So here I am! 🙂

I love when God uses simple, every day moments to check our hearts…when he uses the familiar to get our attention.  I recently had one of those moments…

The other day Brandon, the girls and I were all having a relaxing evening at the house: Karsyn and Dylan playing upstairs and Brandon and I channel surfing on the couch.  Suddenly Dylan burst into the living room and declared that it was time to play!  Here’s how the conversation went…

“Are you ready to play with me?” Dylan asked, bursting with excitement and expectation.
“Well, what are we playing?,” Brandon asked with skepticism.  He was clearly remembering their recent hour spent playing “beauty shop.”
“Daddy, you can be the husband, Mommy, you can be the baby, and I want to be the life!” she exclaimed very proudly.
Brandon and I both looked at each other, trying to make sense of what she was saying.
“Dyl, what do you mean you want to be the life?” I asked, grasping for an actual explanation…which, if you know Dylan, is like asking for a unicorn.  But she continued…
“You know, like Daddy’s the husband, and I’m being you.”  After seeing my puzzled look, she continued, ”Mommy, Daddy’s the HUSBAND, and I am the LIFE!  Don’t you know what I mean?” she asked, clearly exasperated.
And then it dawned on me – she meant WIFE!!  And as cute as this may be, it was really a wake-up call on my position in my household and my family.  Although, for her, it was just a mix up of consonants,  it caused me to ask myself – am I truly the “life” in my house?

When my husband comes home after a long day at work, , do I provide “life” by greeting him with a smile and asking him how his day was?  How HE is?  Or do I provide “death” by nagging him with my “honey-do” list or complaining that he was gone way too long the minute he steps through the door?  He spends his life giving – of himself, his time, his talents –  to others.  Do I spend my time with him lifting him up and replenishing his tank?  Or do I become part of the burden?

When my sweet little girls want to have some mommy play time/talk time/ask 15 million questions time, am I willing to put all my “stuff” aside to spend a few minutes with them – providing “life” – or am I too quick to push them off, claiming to be too busy?  When really I’m just being too selfish?

Because whether I realize it or not, it’s in these moments I am either building up my husband or inadvertently tearing him down.  It’s in these moments I am teaching my girls how to expect me to respond to them…will that response encourage them to come to me?  Because even though today it’s about sidewalk chalk requests and just ONE more snack, before I know it it will be about much greater issues that I will desperately want to have the opportunity to speak life into.

Now believe me, this is not one of those “you never do enough, feel guilty, be selfless, blah blah blah” talks.  Nobody needs or benefits from another one of those.  This is simply an opportunity to take a step back and assess whether or not we are giving our families our best.  Whether we are taking advantage of the huge opportunity to build confidence.  To encourage.  To give life.

Brandon Hester


  1. Thank you so much for sharing! I am a newly wed 🙂 but hope and pray I can be an encouragement to my husband and always remember this!

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